Wednesday, March 4, 2009

TwinSpeak: Do you know an Emotional Vampire??

You know...the kind of person who just can't seem to function unless there is drama in their lives and then in the process drains you of all your optimism and happiness whenever they are around!!

Bella: I have a friend like this and it's always drama, drama, drama. I often wonder if perhaps I live the most boring life in existence or does this girl really have this many problems??? Granted some of the problems she faces really do suck but who doesn't have a sucky week, month or year!! C'mon we all go through it! Yet this girl seems to attract drama and problems life flies to sh*t! Sorry about the terminology but I've just had to endure a 10 page email (if emails had pages) and after finishing it I promptly wanted to throw myself out the window in front of a bus and hope that it finishes the job off.

The email went something along the lines of:

Hey..sorry to hear about (recent family member passing). Yeah my (family member) is so sick...hospitalised...I have to visit her everyday. I'm just so tired and over it. Why can't things ever go right for me.

How's work ? My work is crap. Everyone is giving me problems. Why can't they just like me. I just can't seem to find a job that is good for me. My bosses and all my work colleagues are just ars#holes. God poor me. Why can't things just work out for me.

Well...I have to find somewhere else to live too now. Geez...everything is so crap! My flatmate she's just a b#tch. I mean so what if I stay up late watch TV all night and my boyfriend completely ignores her in her own house! As if we're being rude! God people are so unreasonable.

And on and on this went. For a long time I've noticed this pattern evolving around her and her problems. If all you think is negativity=All you will attract is negativity.

Frankie: Thank fully I don't have any happiness suckers around me anymore. I had to make a decision for myself because I knew that I could be easily drained and affected. However, I feel like I'm becoming like one of those downers; that suck the fun, light-heartedness and warmth out of a situation.

My glum and in-depth views on things can sometimes get me very anxious. I need to focus very hard on being the person that I want to be. I read in someones Bio on here the other day and one statement caught my eye, "I laugh and smile a lot"...I actually wished to myself that I was more like that. Laugh and smile everyday of my existence. Ok, well maybe not everyday because that would be unnatural, but I would like to do it more freely and without having to think about it.
So I am going to force myself to smile and laugh at least 10 times a day and then work up the quota until it's something that just comes second nature. :) It's a small start to a more positive and goofy life that I want to live. I am tired of the up and down emotional spirals. Just give me LIGHT!!!!!


carmar76 said...

I have a couple friends that could be classified as "emotional vampires." That email snippet actually sounded very familiar! And I finally did have to distance myself from one of these friends. We are still friends, and still communicate, but not like we used to. I stopped "enabling" and started speaking my mind! I miss the closeness of the friendship, but I don't regret the decision to focus on POSITIVE things. : )

Frankie - sometimes it helps to just remember one blessing a day. Even when you're feeling crappy or having a bad day, thinking of that one thing can give you a smile, at least for a moment.

Frankie and Bella said...

carmar76: I never thought of it that way. "enabling" but I guess that's exactly what I'm doing. So many times I've just wanted to say exactly how I feel but I know that it would be the straw that breaks the camel's back on an already strained relationship.